Correspondence: A Letter to Kristin|
Posted Sep 03, 2002
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You and I did not know each other but I am sure we could have been kindred spirits. Like you I have two dogs that are very much part of my family. They are my constant companions and if they are not welcome where I go then I am not welcome. Something tells me you felt the same about Sativa and Winter. The photos I have seen of you are so expressive, I would not be in the least surprised if they began to speak.The joy you had at living comes shining through and I find myself smiling through my tears.
Kristin, you were at the gateway to the Ozarks when the unthinkable happened to you. Less than a hundred miles away there is the university town of Fayetteville which I think you would have loved. So many young people like yourself have found a degree of freedom here where I live. At night the sound of drums echos from the street corners near the university where the "alternative folk" gather. Music drifts over the hills in the summertime and the violence that happened to you is almost unheard of. I read somewhere that you were an enviromentalist. Well did you know that we claim Julia Butterfly, the young woman who saved a redwood forest,as our own? She is from Fayetteville. And Deadheads galore!
Kristin, right after you were killed, I had to go to Little Rock for some work related training. I took I-40 and as I neared the rest area where you were killed, my hands began to shake and I was blinded by tears. But I knew I had to stop and talk to your spirit. I parked my pickup and just sat for awhile to gather my thoughts. A movement in a culvert caught my eye. A litter of kittens were playing near the opening of the culvert so full of life and energy. It was a relief to see something of life going on in this place of horror. As I approached to offer some of my sandwich to the kittens, I heard a hissing sound insided the culvert. Inside there was the mother cat letting me know she was watching. Kristin I am so sorry no one was watching for you. I am so sorry no one was there to help. I am sure your dogs did what they could, but how could even they fathom someone harming someone as beautiful and gentle as you.
As I leaned against my truck, I saw a very old man come hurring away from the restroom. He looked somewhat stricken. He stopped and asked me if I had read the flyer on the wall telling about your murder. I had not. He looked so hurt. Others approached the flyer and you could see a physical response to reading it. Most people were just stunned. I knew just how they felt. How could this happen, could the world be this mad?
Kristin, I have a diverse spiritual path. I am sure on your life journey you became familar with different spiritual outlooks. One of my traditions is to cleanse and purifify a space to open it to healing and prayer. I made my way to an out of the way picnic table and unrolled my smudge stick made of sage/lavender/rosemary. Lighting it, I called on the spirits of the four directions to come and bear witness to my prayers for you. I sang to your spirit and talked to you and told you all that I knew about leaving the world and not clinging to any place or thing. I prayed that the creator opened a good road for you to walk straight into what my path calls the summerland. I told you that your dogs were all right and with your family knowing that like me, that is what my spirt would want to know. I told you Kristin that you did not a thing wrong; you were out living your life fully and beautifully and had every right to be where you were. I asked the surrounding earth and trees to release any echos of the horror they witnessed and to be a place of refuge and peace again, but in so doing to release any clues that would reveal your killer. I lit a candle of peace in your memory and left it near the flyer so that maybe someone else would have some comfort when they read the gastly information.
Kristin, your life was so much more than just your murder. If that is all we knew of you then another tragedy would have been committed. I am grateful to your family and all others who put this web site together and gave us more of your story. I hope somehow we can ease thier broken hearts and I do pray for them and Winter and Sativa too!
Micheal [last name removed]
P.S. If anyone should read this letter, I would like to ask you to close your eyes and focus on Kristin' killer revealing himself by his own hand. Put energy into seeing him do something that reveals who he is and what he has done. I see him making mistakes and telling someone what he has done or maybe breaking some other law like speeding and law enforcement is able to connect him to the crime. Use your will it is one of your most powerful tools. I also invoke Luba the ancient wolf mother goddess to seek out justice for Kristin. May she track him down where ever he is and bring him to justice. May he feel Luba's hot breath on his neck and never know rest. May every dog that he encounters know him for what he his and sound the alarm. If he is in the west tonight, the direction of night and water, may he hear the howls of the coyotes and know that they thirst for justice and are hot on his heels, if he is in the north tonight, the direction of earth and winter, may he know that justice like the bear will not sleep untill it is satisfied, if he is in the east, the direction of day and air, may he know that justice has the eyes of the hawk and there is no hiding place and if he is in the south, the direction of fire and summer, may he know that justice will strike just like summer lightning.
So shall it be!